…wholly to be a fool
while Spring is in the world…
my blood approves,
and kisses are a better fate
than wisdom
lady i swear by all flowers…
–e. e. cummings
Gentle Readers, this entry is too long in coming. As some of you know, I absolutely adore the lingerie company Comexim, which not only is one of very few companies that makes my size, but is also pretty much the only company I’ve found that makes bras in my size with underwires graded enough that I’m not being stabbed in the ribs when I wear them. In addition to all that, their bras come in a wide range of styles, colors, and patterns, and I am constantly lusting after this one or that. My most coveted bra last season was the Ingrid, a creamy floral little number that seemed to me to be oh-so-feminine and hinting at days long past. I had to have it. When it finally arrived, I was instantly besotted. I think I may have giggled out loud, even. It was so, so lovely. “I must review this immediately to show the world how beautiful it is,” I thought. “There is no time to waste! I shall ensnare one of my photographers forthwith!” And I did. In fact, I did several times, not that it did me much good. This was last fall, you see, and try as I might, I kept failing to get the photoshoot started before the sun began to set, taking with it the light we needed for our intended shoot, of a woman writing a love letter. It was tremendously frustrating.
The third time this happened, I was SURE we were going to make it in time. Sure of it. I had picked out music to try to embed at the top of the entry for those who wanted some auditory ambiance (if anyone knows a good way to do this, please let me know), had a backstory written in my mind… I was all set. But no. While we were doing test shots, the light began changing again, and rapidly. Every time David got things as he liked, it would all shift again. This involved a lot of me standing there in my underwear trying to stay warm and keep myself entertained. At one point, I just started dancing around like an idiot:
Or maybe I was reciting Shakespeare? I really can’t tell at this point.
And as David clicked away and worked his magic and cursed wildly at malfunctioning equipment, I sort of got sillier and sillier…
(In case you are wondering, at some point I put the dress on because I had been standing there in my skivvies for ages while camera gear was fussed with and I got all cold.)
Aaaaaand sillier…
We shall enjoy it.
As for him who finds
Fault, may silliness
And sorrow take him!
–Sappho
So. Every time we thought we had it, the light changed again, and finally we just decided to do our best and get on with it, abandoning the letter theme and promising to return to it on a bra to come someday. I decided that this very post would be a love letter in itself, to which end I have included in some of the captions bits of poetry and quotations from love letters and even one whole poem that, while sad, has been a favorite since I was young… Anyway, a love letter this is, to the Ingrid, the sweetest of bras. David did an admirable job despite not having his lighting equipment nor a studio, nor, well, anything a photographer would want, and I hope he will forgive me for brightening these up slightly on my own to try to reflect the real colors of the bra and such. He edited the picture at the top of the post… As you can see, I should have left the rest to him as well. But I am determined to get this review up, darn it, so here we go! And David… It’s not your fault. I owe you one, love.
Anyhow, on to the bra! This is one of Comexim’s plunges, and it’s in size 60N. The fabric is sturdy but not terribly stiff, and the colors are much as you see in the pictures: delicate, warm, soft, to me reminiscent of autumn and old, soft, treasured quilts. That is not to say they are frumpy; while the set feels old-fashioned, it is in a wonderful and delicate sort of way.
along the brittle treacherous bright streets
of memory comes my heart,singing like
an idiot, whispering like a drunken man
–e. e. cummings
I have scarcely felt more feminine than when I wear this set (we all define gender for ourselves, so please do not think I speak with some authority on femininity or what defines it – this just fits with that idea for me personally). I love the floral print, dotted here and there with sweet flowers without being too busy or crowded, and the accent of the matching cinnamon ribbon bows on the center gore, the bases of the straps, and the front of the knickers.
“…I am reduced to a thing that wants Virginia. I composed a beautiful letter to you in the sleepless nightmare hours of the night, and it has all gone: I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way. You, with all your undumb letters, would never write so elementary a phrase as that; perhaps you wouldn’t even feel it. And yet I believe you’ll be sensible of a little gap. But you’d clothe it in so exquisite a phrase that it should lose a little of its reality. Whereas with me it is quite stark: I miss you even more than I could have believed; and I was prepared to miss you a good deal. So this letter is really just a squeal of pain. It is incredible how essential to me you have become. I suppose you are accustomed to people saying these things. Damn you, spoilt creature; I shan’t make you love me any more by giving myself away like this — But oh my dear, I can’t be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don’t love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defenses. And I don’t really resent it.”
-English poet Vita Sackville-West to Virginia Woolf
THEY ARE SO PRETTY I CAN’T EVEN. Sorry, I was having a moment there. Anyway, obviously the aesthetics are there. So let’s talk about fit, shall we? Since I still have not managed to get my bra fitting posts finished, I’m going to have to give you a short rundown here of how I like my bras to fit: wide, tight, firm bands; narrow, U-shaped wires, short, fully-adjustable close-set straps that don’t rub at the sides of my arms; rounded armholes, narrow gores, immediate depth in the cups, and not too much cup height. Comexim comes about 1000x closer to this ideal than any other brand I’ve tried, and my guess is that once I’ve tried their lower cup option, they’re going to get even closer. Ostensibly all their plunges are cut the same way, but I find that there are definitely differences in how the bras fit, perhaps due to the way the fabric behaves? Some bra things are still a mystery to me. Anyway, as you can see, the Ingrid fits well and gives a nice, natural profile.
That spring night I spent
Pillowed on your arm
Never really happened
Except in a dream.
Unfortunately, I am
Talked about anyway.
-Lady Suwo
I actually prefer a little more projection and roundness (ie BOOBS IN YOUR FACE WHABAM), which some other Comexim bras have given me in spades (the Tosca was a particular winner in this category, and is what I am wearing under my Brulk outfit in this post and in this post about Braologie’s mini-vests). The Ingrid gives a more toned-down profile, which I think many people might prefer, either for their own personal reasons or to be able to appear more conservative at work, or whatever else. I find that it almost acts as a minimizer, but without doing any of the horrible things actual minimizers do (pushing boobs into the armpits, because obviously that is where those go, flattening them, giving a sort of overall wide, pancake-like appearance… your mileage may vary, of course). In any case, this is an excellent choice when you need a little less projection but still want to feel so very pretty. I do want to show that the profile is still nice and round and such – it may be minimized, but it’s still a great shape:
“I can’t say how every time I ever put my arms around you I felt that I was home.”
Ernest Hemingway to Marlene Dietrich
From the side view, you can see that the wires aren’t creeping around to stab me in the ribs. You can also see how firm the band is, staying neatly against my torso and giving me the support I need to prevent back pain and posture issues. I wouldn’t mind even a little bit more rounding at the armpit to keep it from rubbing, and I’m hoping the lower cup option might help with that.
“Dearest — my body is simply crazy with wanting you — If you don’t come tomorrow — I don’t see how I can wait for you — I wonder if your body wants mine the way mine wants yours — the kisses — the hotness — the wetness — all melting together — the being held so tight that it hurts — the strangle and the struggle.”
-Georgia O’Keeffe
As you can see below, the one issue I have with Comexim’s bras (and, you know, ALL BRAS SERIOUSLY WHYYYY) is that the cups come up a bit high on my chest, sometimes reaching my collar bone. That can occasionally leave gaping at the very top of the cup, even if the rest of the cup is completely filled, volume-wise. I think of it kind of like length on pants; if the legs of your pants are too long, it doesn’t mean the whole pair of pants is too big, it just means you’ve run out of leg. Similarly, when the cups on bras are too tall for one’s frame, it doesn’t necessarily mean the cups are too big, just a bit too tall. I’m really looking forward to trying the lower fabric option and seeing if that solves the problem.
To you;
The way I thought was wrong, having not known, it was right. Here is the proof of my feelings, Don’t hate me, love me forever: —
Beautiful is the world, slow is one to take advantage. Wind up the world the other way. And at the start of the turning of the earth, lie my feelings for thou.
To you
Shame on me.
I love you.
-Charlie Parker
Winter Song
So I go on, tediously on and on…
We are separated, finally, not by death but life.
We cling to the dead, but the living break away…*
As for the knickers… I just love the little ruffly lining on them in the front. It’s delicate enough that it doesn’t show under most clothing, but still adds so much to the overall look. They’re just so sweet. Looking at them makes me smile.Unfortunately, the back of the undies, while still very, very cute, just does not suit my bum very well. I wish I had a more prominent posterior, and I think these would work MUCH better on someone who did… But yes. I am afraid they make my bum look, well, just a bit flat. Enough that the people around at the photoshoot, all of whom have by now seen my bum in various states of dress and undress, remark upon it. Alas. It is a sign of my love for you, Gentle Readers, that I am posting these pictures.
GUH.
AUGH
OKAY LET’S MOVE ON.
….*ahem*…
So by now you might be saying, “But Miss Shapen, we don’t know how to order from Comexim? Isn’t that a Polish company? Can we order from the US and UK? What is this lower cup option you keep going on about?” Let’s sit down and have a chat, and I’ll make everything as clear as I can.
It’s Chattin’ Time with Miss Shapen!
Pull up a chair and let’s get to some Real Talk about bras.
So first of all, yes, Comexim is a Polish company, and communicating with them can be a little bit difficult. The owner, Anna, is EXTREMELY kind and helpful, and I absolutely adore working with her, but unfortunately for those of us who are mono-lingual of the English-speaking persuasion, she doesn’t speak English. You can write to her in Polish or Spanish and get good results, but managing that can be difficult for some. However! In the last while there has been some very good news on that front. There are now two places I know of in the US that are Comexim distributors. The always wonderful Sophisticated Pair is working with them as of quite recently, and there’s also a distributor called Wellfitting that is committed just to Comexim, run by lovely Polish women in California who are extremely well-versed in all of Comexim’s size, shape, and customization options. I have been talking to the gals at Wellfitting for a while now, and am impressed with their helpfulness, knowledge, and commitment to helping everyone find the right size. Wellfitting allows returns or exchanges within 100 days of receiving your bra as long as it is clean and unworn and still has the tags, and once they have received it, they will send you another with no additional shipping cost. They will do it as many times as needed till you have the exact size you need. Now THAT is customer service. I love it. They don’t carry all of Comexim’s styles, but they have 14 listed right now, which isn’t too shabby, if I do say so myself. They carry sizes starting at 26 bands and going up to 46, and their largest cup size is 26O and all the sister sizes above that (ie 28 goes up to N, 30 goes up to M, etc.). But listen up and take note!
What’s this I hear?
The cup sizes are Polish, so you won’t want to take your standard UK size here. They have a size chart on the website, and are also very happy to provide sizing feedback if you contact them, which is something I would highly encourage you to do. Unfortunately, my boobs have grown and I recently had to sell all my Comexim bras, so I can’t tell you what size I currently am. I can say that when I believed I was about a 28K in UK sizing, I was taking a 60N in Comexim, and a 60L in Ewa Michalak. But everyone is different, so definitely get as much information as you can before ordering!
Dagnabit! Why is finding the right size so goshdarn difficult?
“Okay, okay, Miss Shapen, but what about the lower cup option? Are there other customizations? What do they cost?”
Oy, you people are demanding! Kidding, kidding. I live to serve. So back to chatting.
Settle down, I’m getting there, lovelies!
So one of the most astounding and wonderful things about Comexim (as if their narrow wires and huge size range weren’t enough) is their willingness to customize your bras… FOR FREE. “Surely you jest,” you are thinking.
Do I look like I am joking?
This is what I look like when I am joking.
Yep, Gentle Readers. You may request several different customizations to your Comexim bra, as follows:
- A lower or higher gore than their regular height.
- Lower cup fabric.
- Nursing clasps can be added to all plunge bras.
They do recommend – and I think this makes sense – trying an uncustomized bra first as a starting point and then going from there, especially as customized bras cannot be returned or exchanged. Since they offer free exchanges on non-custom bras till you find what is right for you, why not give it a go and then work with the other options? And if you have a way to get to California in August, there’s an even better option! Wellfitting is having their first ever bra fitting party! Woo hoo! I’m going to try to get there. Check out the event here, and let me know if you’re planning on attending!
All of the Comexim bras I have tried so far have been plunges, but Wellfitting is also offering a demi or half-cup now, which I seriously CAN NOT WAIT to try. If you’re looking for that one, I believe the Arizona is the only one being offered in that cut currently.
Oooooookay, I think that is about enough for one entry, don’t you? OY. That really ran away with me. I have another Comexim review coming soon, and then two more in the works, so keep up and check in often! Till then, my loves… Ta ta!
Bisous,
Miss Shapen
*****
Company: Comexim
Item: Ingrid bra and knickers
Size: 60N
Price: The bra is approximately $40US on Comexim’s website (125 PLN), and the knickers are approximately $15 (47 PLN).
*****
Ratings:
Fit: 8/10 Better than most bras in the world. Just a little too tall in the cup and a little too straight at the armpit. And I would prefer a little more oomph, but that’s personal preference.
Quality: 10/10
Comfort: 8/10 The armpits are a teeeeny bit rubby, and I would love a wider band with more hooks in back.
*****
For another review of this lovely bra, check out this post by Undiegamer.
*****
See you on the flipside, readers.
*Since WordPress is being a jerk and won’t actually let me put the full poem in the caption, here is the text in its entirety:
Winter Song
So I go on, tediously on and on…
We are separated, finally, not by death but life.
We cling to the dead, but the living break away.
On my birthday, the waxwings arrive in the garden,
Strip the trees bare as my barren heart.
I put out suet and bread for December birds:
Hung from evergreen branches, greasy gray
Ornaments for the rites of the winter solstice.
How can you and I meet face to face
After our triumphant love?
After our failure?
Since this isolation, it is always cold.
My clothes don’t fit. My hair refuses to obey.
And, for the first time, I permit
These little anarchies of flesh and object.
Together, they flick me toward some final defeat.
Thinking of you, I am suddenly old…
A mute spectator as the months wind by.
I have tried to put you out of my mind forever.
Home isn’t here. It went away with you,
Disappearing in the space of a breath,
In the time one takes to open a foreknown letter.
My fists are bruised from beating on the ground.
There are clouds between me and the watery light.
Truly, I try to flourish, to find pleasure
Without an endless reference to you
Who made the days and years seem worth enduring.
Oh, and a quick last addition… What are your favorite poems or bits of love letters?
Do paste them in the comments, my Gentle Readers, my turtle doves?