Gentle Readers, I don’t know if you know this about me, but I’m a hedonist.  The full title I give to my brand of pleasure-seeking philosophy is actually Reckless and Jubilant Moderately Ethical Hedonist, but I think the one-word version does the trick most of the time.  I love pleasure in all its forms, engaging all my senses, to excess and pretty much without exception.  I could eat my favorite food (lamb chops!) every night.  I only exercise by doing things that I think are fun anyway (like pole dancing).  I like soft things and smooth things, high thread-count sheets and shiny wood floors, massages and belly rubs and head scratchings, and of course pretty dresses and frilly lingerie.  Oh, and I hate being drunk, but will push the line almost any time I have unlimited access to Lambic Framboise or Moscato D’Asti, as they just taste so damn good.  They taste like candy, in fact, which means I sometimes get made fun of for drinking them instead of “real” beer or wine.  But whatever.  I love what I love, and Moscato tastes like peaches and sunshine and Framboise like a raspberry lollipop.  Sweetness, Gentle Readers, is worth seeking out.  So when I got the Soda Fountain Dress in Floral from Modcloth, with its sweet colors and retro style and such lovely little flowers, I knew it needed a setting to match.  So I asked myself –  “what else is oh-so-sweet?”  Why, candy is, of course.  And where better to showcase a Soda Fountain dress than at a candy store that also specializes in carrying an insanely large range of hard-to-find sodas?  Enter Rocket Fizz, just such a specialty chain with a franchise in a suburb of my hometown.

My Intrepid Photographer (MIP hereafterter) and I set off into the heat of the Las Vegas summer, ready to brave the scorching sun for the promise of ice-cold Cheerwine and sarsaparillas and tooth-rotting treats galore. Upon entering, we were greeted with the most tremendous wall of sodas, which caused me to uncharacteristically turn my back to the camera almost immediately.  Luckily, this is actually a dress review, so this unbridled display of wonder just facilitates my giving you a glimpse of the lovely back of the dress.  I love the collar atop the well-tailored shape of the shoulders and cap sleeves, which hold their shape well due to the high-quality fabric (97% cotton, 3% spandex).  There’s that hedonism again – lovely fabrics are coveted by me constantly, whether for softness or, as in this case, for the combination of robustness and a lovely print.  This dress is actually quite a bit too big in the waist, but the included tie belt handily solves that problem without creating a bunchy rear view, and the skirt flares out just enough to give a sweet silhouette without feeling heavy or cumbersome in hot weather.

As I perused the sodas, mesmerized by the wonder of the endless variety of products that are available to the American consumer, I realized that sometimes the quest for numerous choices can lead to some not-so delightful innovation.

Bacon and Ranch flavored sodas: not my bag, baby.  Much better to look at the front of the dress, which is absolutely adorable.  I had to size up to get the bust to fit (hence the large waist area mentioned earlier), but at this size, the ladies are accommodated nicely and the buttons don’t gape.  What they DO do, however, is come open with little to no provocation.  This is literally the only issue I have with this dress.  Play an instrument that sits against your chest?  Dress opens.  Wear a cross-body purse or bag with the strap on the button area?  Boobs galore.  Just walk about your apartment for a few minutes?  Hi, my name is ALL THE BOOBS, nice to meet you.  A single safety pin just under the top button that I fasten (I don’t button all the way to the collar) solves this, and I will probably eventually sew in a small snap as a more permanent fix.  To me, this is too easily solvable to be an issue that would cause me to suggest avoiding the dress.  In every other way, it’s lovely. And

It comes in a lot of other colors as well, so if you like it as I do, you could ostensibly get a whole collection!  I’d recommend starting with this one, though, as

…at how lovely this fabric is!  Why, it’s so lovely that not even this bizarro picture of me attempting to prove I could get an entire giant jawbreaker into my mouth can detract from it…

…I hope.

While I have recently obtained several lovely dresses directly from Modcloth and I am looking forward to reviewing them as soon as I can, this one I got from a source that I won’t disclose because I don’t want you snapping up all the great deals.  Sorry lads and lassies, my lips are sealed.

I hope this post has given you a good enough look at the Soda Fountain Dress in Floral, and that you’ll join me in savoring the last sweet days of summer and the move into fall by picking one up (or wearing one you already have) and sending me a picture of you in it, which I would then happily feature on my FB page, The Tumbrog, or Twitter (your choice, although probably they will all make it at least onto the Tumbrog; I love the Tumbrog).

What color do you like best?

How does this fit you?

Do you experience bothersome button bursting?

Do you not care because it’s so lovely?  Tell me everything.

With tender affection,
Your Sweet Miss Shapen

*****

Company: Modcloth  – Full disclosure – if you’re a new customer and you use this link, you’ll get $20 off a purchase of $50 or more and then I will get a credit to my account for giving you the referral. Feel free to just go to their regular site if this makes you uncomfortable in any way, but I sort of see it as a win-win situation.  :)

Item:Soda Fountain Dress in Floral.  Alas, I see that this print is no longer available.  There are other colors, though, so you can get one or keep an eye out for future print releases!  Just do a search for “Soda Fountain Dress” on the website.

Size: Large. For the boobily joobilies.

Price: All the currently available versions of this dress are a nicely-priced $44.99

Style: Retro, fun.  Good for picnics, or, I suppose soda fountain dates.

Ratings:

Fit: 7/10 – I wish I didn’t have to size up in the bust, but otherwise I really like the cut.

Quality: 8/10 – only points off are for the button issue

Comfort: 9/10 – Overall very comfy, but requires a bit of adjusting to stay on the body in the best positioning.

Style: 9/10 – Look how cute it is!

Fit comments:

See above about boob room and button issues.

My measurements at the time of the photoshoot: 41/27/37

*****

Photography by David Eckert